20 New Quotes about Books (and other topics) from Used Bookdealers
. . . Collected here and there over the past few years.
A curse for underhanded bookdealers:
1. "Let them have a copious variety of urgent, but fraudulent, book orders and increasingly tempting Nigerian schemes richly laden with ornate subordinate clauses, Victorian circumlocutions of cloying sweetness, and semi-plausible misspellings. Furthermore, let their own spellchecker be seeded with random malapropisms." David Anderson
2. "People who haggle over a five dollar book were never going to buy anything anyway." Brian Cassidy, 2008
3. "Creamsicle. My only reason for living as a child. Well, that and the library." Michelle Palmer, 2003
4. "All the scrapbook stores seem to have dogs, and all the bookstores seem to have cats." bookdealer and scrapbooker Marilyn Brownjohn
5. "I am a firm believer that a computer needs a Microsoft operating system the way a dog needs bricks tied to its head." Ian J. Kahn
6. "I don't know why they call it Victoria's secret. Everybody already knows about all that stuff." Victoria, 8-year old granddaughter of bookdealer Jim Hart
7. "Sometimes being born without the shopping gene means I feel like a foreigner in my own economy." Charmaine Taylor, 2003
8. "My acquaintances who are very rich insist that the less advantaged dealers exist to be exploited. The only people who truly count, whose needs and desires should be considered, are the members of the investor class. They all chuckle when I point out they are scum." unnamed bookdealer quoted by Renee Magriel Roberts
9. "I believe most booksellers are, by nature, hoarders." Rock Toews
10. "Incipient fascism is still thought to be curable. When presented with a sufferer of the common bureaucratic malady called cranio-rectal inversion, immediate prophylaxis is indicated." Andris Danielsons
11. "The difference between liberals and right-wing nuts is that right-wing nuts believe that *They* are better than *We and You*, whereas liberals believe that *We and You and They* should be treated equally under the law." Jessie Munro
12. "Specializing in Non-Moveable Type books. Some haven't moved in 17 years." Joe Oprisch
13. "The only effective protection from lies is the developement of critical thinking. Keeping kids in a kind of intellectual padded cell, fed only what their parents believe is true, is a guarantee that they will grow up gullible." Marc de Piolenc, in reply to a news story on parents stealing books from school libraries 'to protect them from lies'
14. "I'm not anti-religion -- I'm anti people who claim religion and practice cruelty." Shirley Bryant
15. "[Vice President Dick] Cheney is a white cat and an eye patch away from being a Bond Villain." Joyce Godsey, 2008
16. "Pricing [antiquarian and collectible books] is an acquired skill, an art, as long-time antiquarian specialists can attest. The presence or lack of a single mark on a single page can triple the price. No algorithm will ever take that into account." -- anonymous, quoted by Chris Hartmann, 2003
17. "Some of those books are too old to have first editions." comment by customer to bookdealer Doreen Steinbeck
18. "People with white carpeting never have good books. I think it's because they care more about appearances than brains." Jessie Munro, only half sarcastically, on how to judge the book potential at an estate sale by the decor in the front room, 2007
19. "These days if I find a mistake that could have been corrected by an editor, I fling the book across the room with great force. Who am I kidding? I stopped reading modern books when I ran out of spackle back in '02." Joyce Godsey, 2008
20. "Learn something new every day, if I'm not careful." Christopher Crockett
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Celebrating the ninth anniversary of the all-bookdealer-owned, all-bookdealer-run TomFolio.com!
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27 December 2009
Labels:
bookdealers,
complaints,
current events,
gwen foss,
humor,
Microsoft,
politics,
quotations,
used books
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