24 Interfaith Season's Greetings, 2009 Edition
1. To my Christian friends, Merry Christmas!
2. To my Catholic friends, Happy St. Stephen's Day!
3. To my Jewish friends, Happy Chanukah!
4. To my Muslim friends, Eid Mubarak!
5. To my African American friends, Good Kwanzaa!
6. To my Zoroastrian friends, Happy Mithra's Birthday!
7. To my Pagan friends, Blessed Solstice!
8. To my Malaysian friends, Selamat Hari Raya!
9. To my Hindu friends, a belated Shubh Diwali!
10. To my friends in the British Commonwealth: Happy Boxing Day early!
11. To my Universalist Unitarian friends, Happy Thomas Starr King's Birthday!
12. To my interfaith friends, Happy Whichever!
13. To my chorister friends: Throw the Yule Log on Uncle John!
14. To my scientist friends: Enjoy the Perihelion!
15. To my websurfing friends, eGreetings!
16. To my folklore-loving friends: Merry Generic Winter Festival!
17. To my friends in retail: Happy Non-Specific Holiday!
To everyone I haven't mentioned yet, 18. Happy Saturnalia! 19. Happy Brumalia! 20. Oneg Shabbat! 21. Yuletide Greetings! 22. Merry Festivus! 23. Season's Greetings!
24. To my Atheist friends, damn it's cold outside!
And a Kickass New Year to all.